Here is my crew... Kw, ds (my boss),

Here is my crew... Kw, ds (my boss), vm, jg, mo.
I share my office with kw and vm. For everyone who has not seen my co workers.
My gmat is tomorrow... I am going to fail, but should end up around avg will let you know how it goes. Oh yeah for those who partake in antm... My call to win is Joanie. We will see tho.
Hope you liked my special bus ride home update.

Best idea ever

Best idea ever
Dumb alarm clock... Forgot to set it for swimming this morn. Now i need to go tonight instead of trying to cram for the gmat.
Anyway i say this alarm clock online that would eliminate the not setting the alarm thing... Easy to tell and set... No little lights that show you, no little buttons to set it. The basic premise is that it looks like an obtuse L so when it up tilted so the clock part is suspended up then alarm on... When clock is flush with the ground then alarm off... Brilliant!
Finally that vernoica mars girl is pretty hot.

Super mario, if i won the lotto.

Super mario, if i won the lotto.
Today should be short... After the other days long ass post it will be nice.
Anyway the pic is what i have thus far on my custom mario theme since i could not find one that satisfies my 8 bit needs. Yeah i borrowed a few ideas from the downloaded theme.

Anyway have you ever wondered what you would do if you won like 100mil from the lottery? Well maybe 100 is too much... We will say 10 mil... Thats about the minimum you can win these days anyhow.
How i would divide the money... 1mil would def go to my parents. Tho i bitch and complain about them they really have done lots for me... Nothing that money could really equal.
Next 1 mil to my sis. Hopefully that could be a good down payment for a house wherever she ends up out in ca.
I would bank 5mil... Maybe set up some sort of thing so i could not use it till i am older.
That leaves 3 mil. 1 mil would def go into the hands of a financial advisor to hopefully grow for the short term.
500k would be to buy some toys. I imagine an old school vette, lotus elise, and something more practical for daily driving.
The last 1.5 mil... Who knows. Spend some on my friends, trip to turkey and a euro trip.
I would try and stay working and still get my masters and shit... Since thats prob the best way for long term success.
Maybe not the best or most exciting way to use up 10 mil, but its my money anyway :).
Hasta.

Money, Cops, Jail, Keys, Vomit - Just a Normal Friday

Ohhhhh my... Lastnight was beyond belief... Prob the craziest night in memory... kinda in a good way since everything ended up ok, but as the title indicates lasntight included cold hard cash, Cops, Jail, Broken Keys, and some good old praying to the porcelin gods :)... prob the bext part is nothing really bad happened to me... yay for staying sober! :). Anyway now that i hopefully have your attention I will go on with the story i wouldnt attpempt to t9 and that i couldnt wait to tell.

So yesterday morning I woke up and went for my usual friday morning swim. Afterwords i met up with the DS to play a little basketball. We decided that we were going to go to Dave and Busters later that night. After ball we met up with some other laf lifeguards and found out that there was going to be an event to get a certian minor drunk tonight for the first time we'll call this minor A Ho. So we agreed that thats what we would do.

The day went on... i studied for my impending GMAT. Watched some Miss USA with mama. Then I rolled out to an evening that i thought would be pretty low key and kind of "lame".

I picked up DS and went to Emily's appt, stopping off to buy a bottle of hypnotic and a 24 case of Bud Light. We got there and as I expected a pretty low key party and kind of lame. We were all just chillin in the kitchen (i have kitchen theory maybe i will write about it someday). There were 8 of us and most of us were trying to get A Ho drunk since thats what she wanted. So she took a shot of hypnotic then moved onto the bud... she didnt like the bud... she wanted something a little more fruity. So me being the nice guy I am told her i would drive my ass to a store and buy something a little more "womany". So i took off... This is where the action starts...

I went to the nearest liq store and got a 6 pack of Smirnoff Green Apple malt stuff and a little bottle of peach puckers. I felt like a fruit buying it, but o well.. for a good cause. So i drive back to Em's appt and when i get there there are 2 cop cars out front. For a split second, the thought that "my" party has been busted and i should run for the hills before i get a serving to minors ticket, crosses my mind, but then i think what are "the chances"? so i grab my liquor and head into the building. As i enter the commons for the building A cop stops and asks me if i'm going to appt 308... I didnt know em's appt number, but i did know that it was on the 4th floor... so without hesitation I say "this building doesnt look familiar... i think i'm in the wrong building... sorry" and just turn the f' around and go right back into my car and put the liquor out of sight.

I call the DS.. but of course i hear a buzz in my car (the chances)... she left her phone in my car... shit.. "wtf do i do now?". So i call Em's phone the DS answers and tells me that the cops are there and she needs her ID (which of course is in my car) I tell her theres no way in hell i'm going back up there... she kind of freaks out on the phone.. so i tell her that i'll take her ID to her. So once again I make the walk to the appt, sans liquor this time, and i just walk right by the cops saying im giving someone their ID.

Luckily by the grace of god the 5-0 doesnt hand out any MIP's or serving to minors or even any tickets at all. They ID'd A Ho, but thankfully she wasnt really drunk at all.. so they didnt really have a case. The funny thing i guess is that while i was not there she walked right by the cops waved and said "hi" then plopped her ass on the couch in front of the door.... rookies.... jeez.

Another odd coincidence is that one of the officers on the scene was officer "peach" who pulled me over for my "traffic offence" and also pulled DS over for her "offence" (the night is filled with odd things like this).. the chances.

Anyway a few min later they arrested Em.. because of failure to appear in court (for a "traffic offence"). The worst part about the whole situation is that she DID go to court on monday and actually was complaining about it earlier that night. Anyway they booked her since they couldnt get a hold of anyone to confirm this appearence... the chances. They said bail would be $500. Holy shit! $500!!!! Anyway being the most sober and responseible i guess... when they said they were gonna book her i ran to the door to find out where she'd be and how much bail was and stuff. Before she left Em looks me in the eyes and says "Please dont let me spend a night in jail". And of course being the good guy i am i vow that she will be released tonight.

The cops tell us to keep it down and they leave with Em. So all the lifeguards get together and plan to all pitch in to bail our fallen comrade out of the slammer. All 4 of us agree that we will go to the bank and pull money. I said we should all take 1 car, but DS for some reason over-rides my decision and says we should take 2 cars. I dont feel like arguing about it.. so we roll out in my car and leave 2 girls behind.... half way to the nearest bank we get a call... The other car (we'll call the other driver "TD") TD's key snapped off in her door... "fuck!" the chances ("the chances" count = 5 btw). We go back and pick the girls up and go to the bank. We all pull out between 100-160 bucks and pull together $500 bucks. Woot! (note the picture)

We agree the minors would stay behind in Em's appt and DS and I would go bail Em out. We drive down to the facility where Em's at and the guard tells us the fee is actually $510! fuck!... We tell the officer we'll be back and we scour the car. We end up with $507 cash... i look at my change pile... 70 cents and a handfull of pennies... for somewhere in the $508's... I had just spent like 4 bucks in quarters at a meter in denver (see the parking nazi post) AND left 2 bucks in my desk at work.. the fuckin chances!!!! (count = 6). So we drive back to an ATM, which is atleast 10-15 min away because the facility is in the middle of no where. I pull even more money out of my ATM.... which i already know had put me in the negative... since i had shuffled funds around and only left $92 bucks in my bank account the previous friday... [insert "the chances" #7].

So we get $540 bucks now and go back to bail Em out. We free Em.... YAY! DS and I agreed that we'd prob want to go home around 1ish... it was already like 1:30 at this point. lol.

Anyway so i drop the girls off at Em's and take TD and her friend to erie to get her extra key so she can retreive her car. That was fine and dandy. We all get back to em's appt and DS and A Ho are trashed.... A Ho was funny at first.. with comments like "my phone saves the outsends and the in sends" (as she sends drunked SMS's). or "the ice cube is going to melt my noodles" (about the ramen noodles she was eating.. we put an ice cube in there cuz she complained it was too hot). Then as the night went on A Ho kept going on and on... and on... and on... and on... (like the fucking energizer bunny...) about randomness and got pretty annoying. DS exploded in the toilet.

When it was all said and done I got home around 4 AM...

The moral of the story... 1) life is fucking odd... 2)when you see the "fuzz" around dont f' around.
3) perhaps my life is more interesting then i often think it is.

anyway sorry about the really long ass posting, but i hope you were somewhat entertained. I'm off to the bank now to put some f'in money in there and hope to avoid over draft fees :(.

finally why do people always hang around the kitchen at parties????

woMAN or woMEN?

woMAN or woMEN?
Since i ripped on the men the other day i thought it was time for some retribution. So w/o further delay... Part two... Where are the ladies at?

So traditional family roles involve the 'home maker'... You know the house wife (not one of those trendy/sell out desperate ones tho). Back in the day the females were required to do things like take care of the kids, cook, clean, watch soap operas, shop, shop, shop...haha jk :)... And you know... Make sure the man is happy (wink wink).
Yeah lame. Anyway lately i have noticed a new breed of females that are less womany. Not to say they are more like men... Just less like those who came before them. I am jumping to conclusions here but as far as i know almost none of my female friends at this point could/would fill this traditional role. I am totally all for the empowerment of the female kind, but careers and other goals in life have caused girls to lose their woman-hood.
Now the ultimate problem with this is that now women who are of this new breed have truely turned into wo MEN. Meaning their lives are similar to their male counterparts. Other then the periods and child birth (whew) women are acting like the traditional man. You know drinking beer, gettin hammered, sleeping around. Hell lately i have heard women burp louder then any man i have heard.
Ultimateley this is all good... I guess. But now i see family as a non-cohesive unit. With out the mom there kids are running around all wild and crazy. People have mcdinners and mc all other meals... Leading to the fatness of today. I am not putting all this on you ladies because we men should pick up the slack. Where i see this headed is back to the old school days of maids and butlers. Cuz when all the working folk refuse to take care of things besides work they will eventually out source the duties.

Monsters in the closet!

This log may not be as good as the original... not my fault.. my phone spontaneously crashed as i was typing the last sentence :(

We all know that the 'typical' child has fears of having -- (insert scary thing here.. i.e. monsters, aliens, fat women trying to hug you whatev) in the closet. And we, us well educated adults, just laugh it off without a second thought. My theory is that we should take a lesson from the kids because we ALL have monsters in the closet.

I know you are all thinking... what a typical thing of me to say, but seriously hear me out. So the story usually begins in the summer of 02 you were out shopping at BR (or your fav store) when all of a sudden something caught your eye... you are thinking this outfit would be so cute/hot with whatever. You contemplate for a second then usually rationalize with a statement that starts like "well at this price...". You go on to wear this SRD (sales rack disaster) a few times, sometimes you even realize you dont know why you bought it in the first place. Thats all fine and dandy, but eventually this garment ends up sitting in your closet waiting, and waiting, and waiting... never to be worn again.

Eventually these clothes always hang around because of excuses like 'maybe i'll wear it someday' or 'it will come back in someday' and inevitably you end up accumulating more and more of these clothes that once were, but now definitely are not. If your closet is anything like mine there is never enough space and having these extras around just packs your wardrobe to the point to where when you take one thing out 2 or 3 others try and come out too. Maybe the reason we dont fear monsters is because we know that nothing could physically inhabit that cramped space we call a closet. I think these 'monsters' are just as bad as the mythical beasts/fat men in speedos that the kids dream about.

What i am proposing is that we fight the penny pinching part of our phyches this weekend and have the great closet purge! Lets free ourselves, our closets, and our poor other outfits from these SRD's. While reasons to keep them around are possibilities one certainty is that looking bad is NEVER in fashion :)

Sorry to fag it up today lol... just popped into my head this morn. I heard a pretty good quote on TV the other day too "as you get older you will realize that not al well dressed, detail oriented men are gay... just many of them happen to be asian" or something like that.. thought it was funny.

An addition that wasnt in this mornings initial blog was about a catering show i went to with a female friend who is going to get married. Anyway we went around and sampled some mighty tasty food. While the food was good I kept having this feeling that people were assuming that me and my little friend were the ones getting married.. so for some reason at one of the last vendors I explain to the lady how im not marrying her im just here to help out with the wedding lol. I dont know why i said it and im sure the lady was like WTF? Im also sure that people did assume things.. o well.. just an odd thing.

Parking nazi zero!, Religion, and other

Parking nazi zero!, Religion, and other oddities
So my birthday has turned into a series of events loosely associated with my birth. This past weekend there was one final activity, a party that was thrown by my friend. I should have snapped some pics, but i did not. Anyway the party was good... I wish that i had not been an ass about it and had actually invited friends, but o well... Had a good time anyhow.
Thanks to the host and hostess and i hope the puke came out all the way (not my fault btw). Also pass a thanks to your friends who populated my party lol
What is up with rich people and tiers crazy new alternative religions anyway? I heard some sound clips from tom cruise this morn and he was explaining the silent birth concept and after that it doesnt seem too crazy, actually sounds logical.
But with easter this weekend and lot of religioning going on it gave me some random thoughts.
What i am seeing as a trend is that well educated people are increasingly turning atheist or agnostic while really rich people are turning to alt religion. Its like religion is the new country club where only rich people get into the church. You dont really hear about or see homeless people preaching the word of kaballa (or whatever madona does).
Someone was talking about this with me, think it was wb, but anyway... In like 10,000 years will people sick up something like the communist manifesto or the da vinci code and take that as the word of a 'god' like entity?
I know it sounds crazy, but millions dare i say billions of people blindly follow old books today. Many follow truely blindly... Meaning they just grew up into the conditioning that the wrath of god will be averted if you just believe. I find there people worse then those who 'found' god. At least people who find religion via divine intervention or other randomly crazy events have had some exposure to other aspects and living life another way... They just did not believe something because their parents sent them to sunday school when they were 5.
But either way i have respect for people who are actually devoted... In todays world where peer pressure and plastic superficial people are everywhere it is tough to believe in anything. A shout out to hoo dawg in k town for being prob the most devoted person i know... Not just a lame poser.

My big accomplishment this weekend was beating the parking nazi to my car and avoiding a ticket. I saw you from my office window, drove around the block and re parked sucker! :)

Ko vs Phelps, strike, and birthday surpr

Ko vs Phelps, strike, and birthday surprise!
I will start with some rejoice that the transit strike is over! No more getting ass raped for 10 parking.
The meet this weekend was pretty good overall, but also pretty lonely without a team/friends. While everyone else chatted it up i did lots of sleeping. Which in the end was prob good since i had no voice and was sick.
Anyway the meet got off on a fun note. Three youngens were lined up in the middle of the pool for the 100 back. Phelps, dave g, and me. Two redic fire drills later the race was on... My only chance to race this so called phelps head to head... Well in true form he kicked my ass lol... O well.
Other events that day were a 200 free that i would like to pretend never happened and a 50 free which i got a PR in, but fell just short of my goal of sub 23 (23.13).
Day two brought 2 very close races between me and dave g. I lost to him by .04 in the 50 backstroke and by .1 in the 50 fly some fun stuff since i never see anyone in my age group. The other race i had that day was the 100 free... I decided i was gonna lay it all on the line. The strategy was to in all out on the first 50 (2 breaths) and just see what was left in the tank. So the start buzzes and i rock the first 50... Meaning i am right with people that are like 2 seconds faster than me.... Then it happened about half way down to the 75... I died... I have never felt so terrible in my 6 years... My muscles could/would not coordinate and i felt numb... I could feel everyone pulling away as i helplessly tried to pull myself together. I finished with a 52.7 which is an unofficial PR. So i am happy with that. Overall the meet was good and i blame being sick for a few shortcomings.
The second day of the meet also happened to be affiliated with my birth. So as i was falling asleep at the meet i hear a voice... I wake up and see my mom.... Which totally confuses me haha. Anyway they were on the way to g-mas house and wanted to meet up for dinner after the meet. So after the meet i met up with them and had another surprise. My aunt jessica was in town. We all went out to eat some korean food. Good food horrible service. Anyway... Thats the weekend update.
Oh yeah my commie friend also left co with japan his destination for the next two years. Good luck my friend.

Little under the weather

Little under the weather
So somehow after staying relatively healthy all winter i am finally getting mine... GREAT... The week of a big swim meet i get hit. O well... Better now then later before nationals (keep your fingers crossed).
Anyway the other big thing that happened this weekend for me is that i watched two deep thought provoking movies. 'what the bleep do we know' and 'v for vendeta'.
What the bleep is basically part documentary, story, science lesson. It basically challenges the very ideas that we think about every day and ties them to physics. Things that we feel are basic essential human feelings i.e. Love is presented in a different light. They say that love is not really a bond between two people that lasts forever and ever, but it is rather us being addicted to the chemical changes that happen to us when we feel love... Regardless who it is.
V was a totally different movie then i planned on. It is more of a political statement than it is am action movie. Many of the issues deal with the proper role of government and how terrorism can be used for fear and for change.
Maybe i did not do the movies justice in my quick reviews but i highly recommend both. I even found what the bleep on google video for free... Maybe it is still there for you. Only am hour and a half long.
Anyhow i should get back to resting so i can pull off a miracle health turnaround

Actual birthday news...

Actual birthday news...
Last night ended up turning into my birthday celebration, but i am not sure how it ended up that way. This 23rd celebration ended up very much like my 21st... We started the night by knocking down some cap mo.
19 shots later the night ended. I woke up at about 1300 and was still trashed... I am now chillin waiting to watch some ball... Still drunk lol. There is the update... I will not do this to myself again... Lesson learned.